Trolley Ride

four years ago this moment and for thenext two weeks was the worst in my life. I was in the fight for my life. I was flatlined just now 4 years ago. Dead and brought back to fight more.

Today now I sit alive knowing I have nothing but life ahead of me.

I’ve crossed fourteen months of remission close to fifteen. So far not my longest but my mindset is much better, I’m not waiting for the other who to drop. And when I have a bad day I purposely dot back and look at the good things in my life. Being in love the best thing by far. But that’s not really why I felt the need to post today.

Why the title of making a difference? Going through over the years I’ve influenced and made an impact on peoples lives whether I admitted it or not. Tonight really opened my eyes to this. I was walking to dinner and passed an open front bar, I glanced in as I walked by not really paying attention, its not a bar I frequent. I made it about two store fronts down when I heard a guys voice say excuse me. I glanced back and a tall you guy was walking up to me. He apologized and said he had a strange question to ask then asked if I’d been a patient at Hoag ten years ago. When I said yes he suddenly grabbed me in a huge and said I knew it was you when you walked by I knew it. Ill never forget what you did for me. I’m josh you used to read to me and play Xbox with me when I had luekemia. You understood me you understood me..

Josh was ten then he was one of the kids I read Harry Potter to and played Xbox with. Treating him like a kid not someone in a bubble. I was suffering like they were and knew the pain his parents didn’t.

So here I stood eleven years later with Josh towering over me thanking me. I got him.. I understood him…. I made a difference

Doesn’t really matter though, this has and is my story written by me,  the good the bad the ugly and lately the sappy.  It’s been a long road and looking back there has been many many times that no one thought I’d make it.  Like my birthday a few years ago…  Other tough times, losing both Bea and Deb my caretakers months apart.

And there are the good,  Kings Dominion with my sister and her family, looking at the signs and realizing between my brother in law and I we had every warning not ride every ride we rode.  Through it all I also found someone who loves me as much as I love her.

So thank you everyone who’s stuck with me for this epic ride, I couldn’t have done it without you all.

Ahh  but this post isn’t about that nor is it a rant. Its the other reason why I love being a tech guy. 

Have you ever seen a mom cry when she sees special pictures she thought lost forever on an old outdated phone or broken computer hard drive?  That look is worth every single question we endure.

One of the worst most emotionally painful things I’ve witnessed is a mother losing her child.  Its not supposed to happen yet it does far to often.  I can’t imagine the pain that a parent feels. I sat here tonight watching a mother do just that.  She’s losing her daughter and there is nothing anyone can do.

No matter the cause whether it be this demon I know so well and have fought, or a random accident the pain is the same for that mother.

Our givers of life bear our greatest gift and suffer our greatest of pains.

I was cured by a case study using stems cells.  Stem cells harvested from me, grown for a direct purpose to combat my particular cancer.  I was the first patient to agree to this particular case study.  Now 2236 kids, all under the age of 15 have been cured of this horrible disease.  What makes this something  is it was done without the use of chemotherapy drugs that are a up to 6 decades old.  Think about it, why have we not had better, something not so invasive?  Who’s stopping the use of these new methods?

Who stands to lose the most with stem cell research? So when the laws are brought up to stop stem cell research my response to anyone opposed to allowing stem cell research.

Go fuck yourself.